Steph's Ripples

When you become aware that you are not who you are, you release yourself from the identification with the ego by simply Being. You are the one seeing the pattern of thoughts. Don't try to justify anything. Be present and watch.  Be aware, be conscious.  Problems are all self-created, due to the need to be superior. The ego is fearful because it feels insecure, vulnerable. Deep with that sense comes the need to always be right. We fail to live by being controlled by our fears, the egotist mind.   We have to separate ourselves from identification with the ego and be.  If we feel negative, there is no room for positivity. Unless you release pain and fear, we become one with it and constantly feel threatened. We are not living, but always fighting and of course, there's no relief. We dwell on the wrong things.  Become aware of the ego-mind and how it works, in every single task you do or things that occur to you. Once you experience and become ...

There has been a recent movement towards minimalism, living a minimalistic life. The idea is to reduce consumption, be comfortable with what you have and live a clutter-free life.  Many of us cannot tolerate the idea is living without being surrounded by material things. We feel so comfortable in an environment of accumulation and we fail to see that our belongings are not only taking physical space but also mental space. I was slowly progressing towards clearing my space when I came across the term and it clicked. It was like the word definition to what I was going through. Although I wouldn't call myself a minimalist, I now take more care of my space. I'm more appreciative of what I have and feel less compelled to buy things. I realise material things are not valuable to us unless we are using them. With this in mind, I ask myself if I really need that item, will it bring anything positive to my life? If not, I don't need that item. I make better purchasing choic...

We love stories. People love hearing stories. We live with stories we made up and hear constantly. Fact is there isn't much truth in stories. Most stories are told by our own experiences and perspectives. Our stories are our own; they belong to us individually. So the stories told by other people do not necessarily apply to us. In most cases, they mislead our self-judgement and let us astray.  Also, general stories we tell ourselves (based on what is deemed as normal and in reference to the past) are not necessarily correct. Stories are essentially what they literally mean, according to Oxford dictionary:  " an account of imaginary or real people and events told for entertainment." They are all completely made up. We established our capabilities based on our stories from past experiences. Having said that, what you were yesterday does not  predetermine  who you are today or tomorrow.  Let me give you a perfect example of a flawed story: T...

Deep down, we are all positive souls. We are naturally good. However, we have a tendency to block that positive energy flow. In so doing, we let negative energy linger. Based on our past, the bad thoughts keep coming. The reason we feel pain is because we close our hearts unintentionally. We close that energy flow and focus on the bad memories. When we close ourselves, we cannot let anything good in. Pain feeds on pain. To be positive, you have to let go of all the feelings. Be open. Be aware of the present. Let the experiences come and go. Be happy. Breathe and release the tension, built-up emotions. Free yourself from your thoughts. Choose to be in control of your thoughts and emotion. You have control. 

My perspective on the past has changed significantly. I used to feel embarrassed, ashamed that I'm not where I'm meant to be- even though I didn't quite know what I was aiming for. "Living without an aim  is like sailing without a compass' - John Ruskin It took me forever to know where I'm headed. To do this, I had to come at peace with my past. By thanking my past for all that it has taught me- the experiences, the bad, the good, the memories, the lessons.  I realised that the past has done what it could. I did all that I can in the best of my ability and knowledge at the time. Part of growing is not knowing and the quest for that wisdom. Over time, you come to terms with yourself.  The past is not you. The past has helped you to where you are now. Treasure your past for the experiences. Your past doesn't define you. The past is gone.  Embrace your past. Thank it. Let go of all that is holding you- the stories, the limiting thoughts an...

We spend far too much time worrying about small things. We waste our life by not living. We are not living when we: Compare Resist Deny Judge Complain Refuse to be kind Act unrespectfully  Do not follow our heart We have a high propensity to be negative. Negativity can only be associated with unhappiness and pain. Remember we have only one life and our life on Earth is limited. Make everyday count. Live every day as if it is your last. I don't want to sound pessimistic but realise that your life will be so much more rewarding if you have a purpose in life, are kind and practise gratitude. Life is meant to be lived. Be open to the beauty of each and every day.

I was made aware of this concept whilst I was reading the book 'The Slight Edge' by Jeff Olson. We have the ability to choose what we want to do with our lives. The distinction between those people who are successful- not referring to financial gain- and those who are unsuccessful comes down to habits. What is it you are making every day that is bringing you forward towards achieving your dreams/ goals. What is it you are doing that is moving you away from your dreams? Successful people do what unsuccessful people don't do. They are committed to self-development, growing, doing what it takes every single day- the mundane actions. Take for example, reading 10 pages a day compounded over time leads to a great deal of pages read. You don't have to start big, but create a momentum. Daily repetitive actions over time lead to accumulation of wealth. The problem here is that not many of us are willing to do those actions every day. We are quick to sink to old habits, we a...

One of the most life-changing moments in my life has been to realise that I was not living in the present. This was the decisive moment I truly understood what was stopping me from being me. I was not living, merely existing. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle really put perspective in my life.  The instant I realised this was a moment of pure enlightenment. Something can be written, told, but until it is experienced by you, it is difficult to understand. Accept that the past is gone and the future's out of reach. By constantly thinking about the past, our previous experiences and the future- what if, we forego what we actually own- NOW! It's so easy for us to forget to cherish the present moment, and by so doing we are left in a state of pure dissatisfaction, unhappiness. We are never truly happy because we are not appreciative of the now. Our mind is either distracted by the future or past actions, events. When you acknowledge that pain is created by not being presen...

One of my favourite quotes is 'A journey of a thousand miles  begins with a single step'. Tiny steps make way to a great path. Life is not necessarily about reaching that dream, but growing and discovering yourself along the way. It's about finding yourself and becoming the person you can be- reach your potential. It's also about feeling content, and knowing that what you are doing is right. Life is about being you. Too often, we get lost in the madness of this world. It's really hard to pull things together sometimes. We are unsure what to do next. There is a myriad of challenges, tasks to complete, unexpected circumstances. What you can do is try to focus on one thing at a time and not juggle with too many tasks. Tackle one thing at a time. Give it your full attention and be immersed in that single task fully. In so doing, you don't feel overwhelmed and actually build momentum to tackle what's next.  We're filled with information everywh...

I have always been a great affirmer of positive reinforcements. Positive affirmations bring light in our life. Our thoughts have a tendency to be negative. How many times do you feel like you are being thrown over the edge? We are quick to succumb to doubt, anger, fear.  Deep inside, we are strong, fearless and confident human beings. However, all these positive innate qualities are buried as we grow up, due to criticism, embarrassment and judgement. Our family has expectations from us, everybody seems to know what's best for you. At a young age, it doesn't really matter. Our mind is not fully developed, so we take in everything, without really questioning its significance. Truth is we don't know the impact until much later. Indirectly, we let our inner desires fade away in the process; we don't know any better. We do what we must, based on society's beliefs of the definition of success. Unfortunately, when we don't follow our heart comes a deep sense of un...